For Lillian

- castles -

(my youngest daughter

pointing to the turrets)

- High Park -

high in her stroller,

watching fast flights of people

chasing health

we live in a basement apartment

pay the rent

neglect the upkeep

place plants on window sills

watch water disappear

we mop paint from the walls

scrape the table after meals

toss toys into buckets

and smile over the way

she yells at us

one of the small ones

she sings and sings

she should be sleeping

but

- no -

never still

my youngest waves like catgrass

winds her watcher

and points

says she wants to go in

- in -

to the castles.

Eating or Escaping: two takes on the same car ride.

This morning's conversation in the car went something like this.

Lillian: [stops singing to herself. Pauses.] I wanna see Gramma!

Me: Grandma is not here, sweetie.

Lillian: I wanna see Gramma!

Morgen: [snickers]

Me: should we ask Grandma to come for a visit?

Lillian: [pause] I want a muffin!

Me: [???]

Gavin: I think she means timbit. She thinks muffin means timbit.

Morgen: [smiles and giggles]

Me: Morgen, are you smiling because your sister is so funny?

Morgen: No, I'm smiling because I'm thinking about going far away from here! On a SPACE SHIP! To OUTER SPACE! hahaha.

Twenty minutes before, I'd been trying to teach the kids the lyrics to "Born to be Wild," because that is what my dad always played for us when we went somewhere fun in the car...and then I gave up because it wasn't making much of an impression. Three days ago Grandma and Grandpa Lovett came by with a big box of timbits...it takes a lot of recall and a certain amount of free association to keep up with the little Lovett-Hammels' conversations these days. But if you get lost, a good rule of thumb is this: Lillian is usually thinking about food, and Morgen is usually thinking about escape.