Family Ties

Remember this post from when Morgen was a something-month old? Well, last weekend we were surprised to discover that the shirt still fits her (if we leave the snaps undone). And of course, Grandpa was happy to dress for another photo opportunity - even if Morgen was less than cooperative.

In other news, Lillian Dawn met one of her namesakes last week - and managed to be awake for some of it. That would be the sum of our news post bike seat. Pretty exciting, isn't it?

We've been trying to work out our new family dynamics, and we're finding the balancing act a tad challenging. How do we fit "me" time into "us" time, when us is a nursing newborn, a toddler, and two phD students who are supposed to be working on their dissertations while caring and working for the newborn and the toddler? Is there any one out there who has done it and has an idea? So far, we're taking care of the kids just fine, but the adults are starting to look rough around the edges. Don't even ask us about the school work right now.

I've got a bike, you can ride it if you like ...

One of my fondest memories from early childhood are of family bike rides. When I was about 4 or maybe 5, my parents would take us on occasional bike rides around the neighborhood, me perched, in retrospect somewhat precariously, in a makeshift seat behind my mom's bike (a double basket with a blanket for padding) and my brother in a fairly flimsy plastic yellow seat behind my dad's. Such an arrangement would undoubtedly draw criticism today. Still, I loved those bike rides, and I would love to provide similar memories for my girls. So, with that in mind, last weekend I took my bike in to the local bike shop to have a toddler seat installed. And today Morgen and I went to pick it up - and to have our first father-daughter bike ride.

Well, some things have changed over the last 30 years. The toddler seat is now safety certified and made of very hard, durable plastic with a back that provides plenty of neck support. The seat even comes with a bright yellow cushion for comfort. And of course no children's bike ride today would be complete without a bike helmet. Morgen's "bike hat" is pink with little white bunnies.

Other things, however, haven't changed at all. Morgen loved her first bike ride - about a mile and a half during crowded and hectic rush hour from the bike shop to our apartment. And despite the challenges of bumper to bumper traffic and riding in office clothes, I really enjoyed it too. Hopefully someday Jessica, Morgen, Lillian and I can all go out for regular rides.

Preferably at a park or on quiet residential streets. In shorts.

Happy Mother's Day!

My mother's day: watching my children play with their grandparents in Wellesley. Seeing the yellow chair my dad made for me regain former glory with a little help from Morgen and some stuffed animals. Anticipating yummy food, none of which I made myself. If only we could live here!

Accidental News

Big news, friends and relatives: Morgen used her potty this weekend for the first time.

Hasn't she used it before, you ask? Well, in a way, I suppose she has. For the past several months she has sat upon it, kicked it, put Leona her pet lion in it, tried to run around with it, etc. All of that aside, she had never really used it the way it was intended to be used until Friday night, when her full bladder and routine pre-bathtime potty practice coincided. It surprised all of us - usually Morgen says "I have to pee on my potty" and then pretends to go pee "Like Mommy does!" or "Like [insert any potty-trained toddler friend's name] does!" Usually we just praise her for sitting on the potty, and then dump her in the bathtub. But this time, a confused but willing Morgen had the opportunity to use toilet paper, wash her hands and then flush the big toilet once her potty had been emptied into it. Then she was subjected to all kinds of cheers and congratulations by her whole family.

Morgen has been eyeing her potty with a bit of suspicion since Friday. It is as if discovering its true use has somehow diminished the potty's potential to be fun in Morgen's eyes. I'll keep you posted, but I'm fairly certain that Morgen is a long ways away from potty training. We're treating Friday's event like a happy accident - but hey, I'll cheer for happy accidents anytime.

In other news, Lillian continues to sleep during the day and wake up to play and/or cluster feed through the wee hours of the night. And she looks really cute in ladybugs, doesn't she? I think she has the look of a high fashion newborn in the below pic.

Almost three weeks as a family of four

I'm not sure what happened to last week - I meant to put up an earlier post, but somehow the days slipped by and so this post is more of an "almost three weeks with Lillian" update instead. Don't be fooled by the pictures of the baby awake. As Morgen will tell you, Lillian is most often asleep. Morgen finds it a bit annoying, but I'm going to enjoy it while I can. Let's face it, some day the little one is going to wake up and make all kinds of extra demands on her parents and sibling. For now though, she is mostly a sleepy baby - and a very noisy sleepy baby, as you will discover when you meet her.

So far, Morgen has been expressing her displeasure over the change in our family unit in very natural and small ways, most of which are directed at me. She refuses to hug or kiss me from time to time, and she gets upset when she has to go to school while I stay home with Lillian. We decided to keep Morgen in daycare during the newborn period so that she can have some fun, non-baby influenced playtime everyday with her friends and with the amazing people who are her caregivers there. I have to remind myself that this continuity for her (not to mention the rest for me) is worth it in the long term, even though there are a few moments every day when mommy guilt rears its ugly head and I feel like less of a parent than my mother was (my mother who cared for two babies while my dad traveled back and forth to school and work every day). Hopefully, in a few months, Lillian will be more fun for Morgen - and happily, Morgen is very gentle and considerate of her baby sister. Morgen gives Lillian hugs and kisses at bedtime, and while I know she may be doing this to emphasize the hugs and kisses she isn't giving me, I'll take this form of jealousy over the violent kind. We've been giving Morgen little pep talks at bedtime about how special and unique she is and how much we love her, and by the amused look on her face and the way she now prompts us to have the talk in between her book and her lullaby ("Only one Morgen!") I think we're at least providing her with some extra entertainment, making family change more fun, even if it is still change...and by making sure Morgen gets some alone time with mommy every day I hope to earn some of my hugs and kisses back one day soon. Ugh, the little ones know how to get you where it hurts! I miss my hugs and kisses.